Family Reunion

Blending combining parts of words Blend Words
This form of being humorous is when a comedian / actor is able to coin a new term by combining two singular words into one. We’re aware of blend words like say, brunch (breakfast+lunch).
Alibya, Sickaragua, Relexico, Swingapore, Sportugal, Faustralia

Ribaldry, or blue comedy  also called off-colour, or risque (from the French word for “to risk”); relies on impropriety or indecency for comic effect. (A related type is broad humour, which refers to unrestrained, unsubtle humour often marked by coarse jokes and sexual situations).

Sexy: Totally compatible with our technology

There is nothing against sex as long as it doesn’t degenerate into a marriage.

                                       Johann Hamza (Austrian, 1850-1927)  ‘the wedding.

Bodily functions: Residency of the toilet jokes
Refers to:
A. Make a discharge arrangement
B. Activate an evacuation procedure

A burlesque is a literary, dramatic or musical work intended to cause laughter by caricaturing the manner or spirit of serious works, or by ludicrous treatment of their subjects. The word derives from the Italian burlesco, which, in turn, is derived from the Italian burla – a joke, ridicule or mockery.
Has the elegance of a heavily pregnant belly dancer.

Character comedy stereotypes, a persona invented by the performer.
Concentrated despair
Depression in powder form

Children’s humour
Mother: What an annoying child you are, you look exactly like your father.
Child: O, well,…. do you know who that is?

Clowning
Worse than cloning (clone a clown)

Conundrum
Also known as riddles, these questions or situations as one puts it, is a kind of mystery to solve or has a ‘pun’ answer to the riddle. Conundrums usually are those that entail a pun-like answer to it, where the opposite of these, that is ‘enigmas’ are where riddles are more mathematical or logic-based.
If it takes a ship 40 days to travel from Amsterdam to
New York, how long will it take 40 ships?
(see: Torpedo)

Storm At Sea Painting by Ivan Konstantinovich Aivazovsky (1817 – 1900)

Cringe Comedy  the comedy of embarrassment.
Any talk-show will do

Crosstalk
a.  Only stupid people know everything absolutely certain
b.  Are you sure?
a.  Yes, absolutely.

Deadpan Delivered with an impassive, expressionless, matter-of-fact presentation, said with a straight face.
The pursuit of profit: An outstanding practical orientation, with a not entirely relative interest in acquiring assets.
Hereby keeping a certain distance to phenomena that cannot be adequately comprehended such as: fairness, dignity and integrity.

Derivation adding prefixes and suffixes creatively, albeit in conformity to general derivation rules
Brylcreeminal

Dry Humour
Dry humour is the expression of humour in an unemotional manner, dry humour is defined by the manner in which it is expressed, rather than the content. 
The only thing I wanted was everything

Droll Humour  used to mean “buffoonish”, a jester, amusingly odd, whimsically humorous, zany behaviour and speech, capricious or eccentric.

              Das komische Duell                                   Ludovico Marchetti (Italian, 1853-1909)

Embarrassing and social ineptitude
Really silly

Exaggerated Humour:
Police Officer: “I would by no means want to suggest that you were driving too fast sir, but some heat tiles were released when you entered the atmosphere.”

Epigrammatic Humour consisting of a witty saying such as “Too many people run out of ideas long before they run out of words.” (Not all epigrams are humorous, however.)
If you don’t have a bad conscience,
you don’t have a good memory

Euphemism A euphemism is an innocuous word or expression used in place of one that may be found offensive or suggest something unpleasant. Some euphemisms are intended to amuse, while others use bland, inoffensive terms for concepts that the user wishes to downplay.
Mortality: Like the river runs into the see, time runs into eternity

Farce is a comedy that aims at entertaining the audience through situations that are highly exaggerated, extravagant, and thus improbable. Farce is also characterized by physical humour, the use of deliberate absurdity or nonsense, and broadly stylized performances. It is also often set in one particular location, where all events occur.
Distribution system for recycled nonsense

Gallows Humour
Gallows humour is a type of humour which arises from traumatic or life-threatening situations such as wartime events, mass murder, hostilities or in other situations where death is impending and unavoidable. This genre is similar to black comedy but the only difference is that the comedy is created by the victim.
World Peace: An event that has been canceled due to lack of interest.

Heritage comedy highlighting humorous traits or characteristics from a culture or heritage.
England: Where the wicked play cricket.
 
The Netherlands: Shamelessly flat geographical joke.

France: After 125 years there are still no roof tiles on the Eiffel Tower.

Belgium: Name of the collection of problems that exist between France and the Netherlands. 

High/highbrow Humour pertaining to cultured, sophisticated themes.
Good intentions form a temporary chairman. 

On the shorelines of time, rests the ship of oblivion.

Ivan Aivazovsky (July 29, 1817 – May 5, 1900)

Humorously dim-witted logic. Dim–witted not intelligent : stupid
A heart attack, …. can’t you do that at home?

Hyperbole is the use of exaggeration as a rhetorical device or figure of speech, it emphasizes, evokes strong feelings, and creates strong impressions. As a figure of speech, it is usually not meant to be taken literally.
It is extremely difficult to comprehend that so much stupidity is concentrated within one person.

Improvisational Comedy where the dialogue or behaviour is not planned beforehand.
(usually by someone who has Korsakov syndrome).

Impersonator
“Mr. Johnson, you should try to be more yourself,
if there was a Johnson lookalike contest, and you would participate in it yourself, you would end up in last place.”

Insult comedy a form which consists mainly of offensive insults directed at the performer’s audience and/or other performers.
According to the physical principle that one cannot clean something without making something else dirty

Ilja Repin “Reply of the Zaporozhian Cossacks”

Ilja Repin “Reply of the Zaporozhian Cossacks” second version.

Innuendo
An innuendo is a hint, insinuation or intimation about a person or thing, especially of a denigrating or a derogatory nature. It can also be a remark or question, typically disparaging (also called insinuation), that works obliquely by allusion. In the latter sense the intention is often to insult or accuse someone in such a way that one’s words, taken literally, are innocent.
He is a nice person, and none of his illnesses are imaginary.

Irony is a trope that involves incongruity between what is expected and what occurs and hence is a popular type of humour. Irony is portrayed through words or actions to express something completely different from the literal meaning.
The truth: A certain uninteresting quality, that one must carefully keep out of one’s statements.

Joke A joke is a display of humour in which words are used within a specific and well-defined narrative structure to make people laugh and is not meant to be taken seriously. It takes the form of a story, usually with dialogue, and ends in a punch line. It is in the punch line that the audience becomes aware that the story contains a second, conflicting meaning. This can be done using a pun or other word play such as irony, a logical incompatibility, nonsense, or other means.
What was his Signalement?
O, you mean his Primary characteristics.
With that chin protruding forward, that receding forehead and those floppy ears, he looked like a beige Volkswagen beetle with the car doors open.

Juvenile/sophomoric: Humour involving childish themes such as pranks, name-calling, and other immature behaviour.
Doesn’t have any serious plans to become an adult.

Lexemes
Most humorous lexemes can be conceptualised as neologism.
Those are new words indispensable for naming new inventions and discoveries. However, speakers will also incorporate new words in their idiolects, the sole reason being the novelty of expression and humour. Humorous neologisms capitalise on various word-formation processes.
A coining – creating new morphemes
Sen-bloody-sational

Macabre
The cringe worthy.
His head was separated from his torso and other vague complaints.

A metaphor is a figure of speech that, for rhetorical effect, directly refers to one thing by mentioning another. It may provide clarity or identify hidden similarities between two ideas. Antithesis, hyperbole, metonymy and simile are all types of metaphor.
Dogmatic: The trumpet call announcing the arrival of the approaching light, here replaced by a foghorn.

Mocking Humor: making fun of someone or something.
I would not in any way want to suggest that you are lying,
or that your claims are at odds with the truth, but if you happened to be Pinocchio, you could smoke a cigarette in the shower.

Mockumentary  A parody using the conventions of documentary style.
Ubermensch and Underdog

Morbid humour: “humour out of the deepest, darkest, situations in life.”
Murder: Speeding up the decision-making process with regard to staff flow and job vacancies

Mordant: Caustic or biting humor (the word stems from a Latin word meaning “to bite”). Not to be confused with morbid humor.
Nuclear weapons are a sign of our Christian love for our neighbors

Musical Comedy: A form of alternative comedy where humour is mostly derived from music with or sometimes (if you’re lucky) without lyrics

Non-Sequitur (Latin: sequor means to follow). The punchline is something that is irrelevant and absurd, and opposes the audience’s expectation of a logical ending.
You’re never too old to die

Observational Comedy – poking fun at everyday life, humour in everyday life, inflating the importance of trivial things, or observing the silliness that society accepts as normal. The ability to poke fun at everyday life.
Depression; that there are 27 different explanatory models regarding to depression, all of which contradict each other, is the main cause of this psychological disorder among psychologists

Happiness: A certain elusive quality……
Seems to be situated elsewhere 

Off-the-Wall Humour
Off-the-wall humour is the expression of humour that is bizarre or absurd.
Condom use: The distinguished consideration, that at all times, a respectable distance to strangers must be taken into account.

One-liners A joke that is delivered in a single line. A good one-liner is said to be pithy – concise and meaningful.
Interview: Vanity questioned by stupidity.

Overstatement
A simple form of verbal irony is an overstatement, also known as exaggeration, that isn’t meant to be taken literally
“Even though we now search and stumble through the labyrinth of existence, one day we will have wings and steal the fire of the Gods.”

I don’t think so….
Think twice….
Is there a doctor here?

Parody
Parody is defined as a work created to mock, comment on, or poke fun at an original work, its subject, or author, by means of humorous or satiric imitation. Parody is nothing but a composition that imitates or misrepresents somebody’s style in a humorous way.
Anger attack: An artistic expression in which the manifestation of the personal experience is paramount.

Phoneme substitution Phoneme substitution refers to the ability to replace a phoneme in a word with another phoneme to form a new word.
The abject subject 

Respect, reflect, reject.

Physical Comedy: people falling down, pranks, the dramatic telling of jokes, humor involving physicality, clowns, mimes, funny facial expressions.
Breaking a leg will do nicely

Postmodernism:
a. The sky is blue
b. Why do you discriminate against other colours?  Don’t they have any feelings, You creep!

Prop comedy Relies on ridiculous props, casual jackets or everyday objects used in humorous ways
A clowns nose full of cocaine

Purposeful ambiguity  a word or a string of words dubbed the punning element, manifesting itself in one form (or two very similar ones) but conveying two different meanings.
Orator: Is someone who can explain in ten minutes why he doesn’t have a minute

You can’t get better. 

Homonymy. two synchronically unrelated senses
Two concepts, A and B, are expressed by the same symbol. Ex-ample: Both a financial institution and a edge of a river are expressed by the word bank (the word has two senses).
She laughed, she laughed, she laughed and then she left. 
                                                                                                                                                                 He went to Paris, to perish. 

           Marie-François Firmin-Girard – Autumn Market at Les Halles Paris (c. 1860s-1910s)

Polysemy, two different but related senses
W(h)at(t)  is the standard measure of electrical power (?)

(What / Watt).    Question + answer

Homophony, phonetic similarity
Alice D.
Mary Johanna

Practical joke:
Cause of death

Putdowns
Remarks which are to be regarded as putdowns, i.e. putdown humour are based on ridicule, mocking or sarcasm
He cannot even find a gas leak with a lighter

Repartee
A repartee is a conversation that includes a number of witty retorts. The term suggests a playful interchange that is cutting but nonetheless enjoyed.
Idealist: It is better to be poor and healthy, than to be rich and sick.

Pragmatist: It is better to be rich and healthy, than to be poor and sick.

Healthy and Wealthy.

A roast is a form of American humour in which a specific individual, a guest of honour, is subjected to jokes at their expense, intended to amuse the event’s wider audience. Such events are intended to honour a specific individual in a unique way.
He has only two good qualities, his absence and his mortality.

Sarcasm – can be subtle, often reflects a dark/pessimistic view of life.
The message of your illness pleasantly surprised me

Satire is a genre of literature, and sometimes graphic and performing arts, in which vices, follies, abuses, and shortcomings are held up to ridicule, ideally with the intent of shaming individuals, corporations, government, or society itself into improvement.
Monogamy: A social interaction with a limited field of participants.

Screwball: Akin to farce in that it deals with unlikely situations and responses to those situations; distinguished, like farcical humour, by exaggerated characterizations and episodes of fast-paced action.
Appling nuances with an axe.

Self‐denigrating humour: Humour in which performers target themselves and their foibles or misfortunes for comic effect.
I only made one mistake in my life, ….my birth.

I’m not intelligent enough to be depressed.

Self-enhancing humour. People that fall under this dimension of humour tend to take a humorous perspective of life. Individuals with self-enhancing humour tend to use it as a mechanism to cope with stress.
“Were all dust in the wind”
“Yes, …. Gold dust.”

Semantic phrasemes manifesting humorous potential are characterised by novelty and capitalise on the surprising juxtapositions of their subordinate elements.
Life is big and grey, but nevertheless not an elephant.

                                                      Edwin Lord Weeks (1849 – 1903)

Shortening Abbreviation
PDF-file …paedophile?

Sitcom Scripted dialogue creating a thematic situation; commonly found on television series
Closely representing your own family life,
but most of the time even more boring.

Situational Comedy humour arising out of quotidian (everyday, ordinary) situations, scripted dialogue creates a thematic situation.
Marriage: A form of absurdist theater, where the woman has a decorative – and the man a ceremonial function.
However, there are quite a few ambiguities regarding the command structure within such a conglomerate.

                                      Johann Hamza (Austrian, 1850-1927)  ‘the wedding.  

Sick comedy this comedy favoured observational monologues, often with elements of cynicism, social criticism and political satire, which audiences at the time may have found controversial.
Sociopathic: A truly authentic existence, to a life that the person concerned can truly call his own life.
Free from conventional restraints.
A non-conforming original existence.

Sketch – shorter than sitcoms, usually performed live.
Normally I eat only one pastry, but maybe I have to adjust my variables.

Slapstick: Comedy in which mock violence and simulated bodily harm are staged for comic effect; also called physical comedy.
Greetings from Absurdistan.

Subtle humour:
Break your neck to get a laugh.

Spoof: a funny version of a work or genre to make fun of, or ridicule, just to make people laugh.
                               Public transportation in the 19^th century

Stand-up Comedy
This involves a comedian standing up in front of a crowd and amusing them with jokes and funny stories.
The Cool Fool.

Surreal Humour – trippy, bizarre, creepy but hilarious, crazy experiences, nonsensical and nonsequiturs, bizarre juxtapositions, absurd situations, nonsensical themes, nonsense logic.
In the land that’s called tomorrow,
There will be no pain or sorrow.

Topical Humour – humour based on current events or trends.
Fashion: God of madness.

Fashion quirk: it is about the thought that isn’t behind it.

Fashion: Form of vulgarity that periodically ravages the street scene.

Alonso Pérez  (1881 – 1914)

Tragicomic is a literary genre that blends aspects of both tragic and comic forms. Most often seen in dramatic literature, the term can variously describe by either a tragic play which contains enough comic elements to lighten the overall mood or a serious play with a happy ending.
Tragicomedy is a Siamese twin, in very poor health.

     Franz (Bernard) Gailliard (1861-1932) “La Place Sainte Gudule à Bruxelles Après Le Carnaval”

Understatement
An understatement is a statement that is less dramatic than expected for the situation. This tends to be ironic.
Cosmos: Perhaps somewhat too big for vacuum cleaning.

Witticism,/ Wisecrack, Usually a play on words, this humour involves twisting language around with humorous results.
Earthquakes: The sudden movement of the Earth’s tectonic plates, resulting in shaking of the ground. These do not occur in Europe because there are legal provisions and requirements that prevent this.

Word substitution
As old as Methusalem,
And as far as Jerusalem.

Addition
The apple does not fall far from the tree,
which catches a lot of wind,
which one can enter,
which does not grow into the heaven,
and which one does not see through the forest.

Traditionally there are about 90 different types of humour, as shown here above.
Here below are some supplementary additions:

Upgrading: The use of overly complex and sophisticated language to express something very simple
D-cup: Pertaining to the aesthetic appreciation of symmetry.

The use of highly aesthetic language to express something scandalous
Fellatio Hornblower.

The use of highly artistic literary style to express something mundane
Music clip: The display of scantily dressed young women may have a certain aesthetic quality, but this has generally more of a geometrically configurative character, rather than the kind of aesthetics that was traditionally envisaged in a musical performance. 

The use of highly technical language to express something mundane
Chocolate bonbon: form of happiness that meets the objectivity criteria    …..When delivered in industrial quantities.

Sudden thematic change
“Life goes on,
that is, ….. if it doesn’t stop.”

                            Francisco Pradilla Ortiz Aqua Regia  “Doña Juana la Loca” [1877]

Rehabilitated Clichés
Negativo: “Don’t be happy, worry.”
To make a short story long
Comparing apples to oranges and selling them for lemons.
Well begun is half done (Start twice)
Remember you will die. (That’s just a rumor)
Never look a stolen horse in the mouth.
Finders keepers, losers weepers. (If you find a hat and there is no head in it, you can keep it).

Something that is popular describing as shockingly uninteresting
Aerobics: A certain type of activity by which fools keep themselves busy, because of the limited nature of their intellect.

Epitaph: a saying in honor of a decedent, often engraved on a headstone or plaque.
Humorous inscriptions on tombstones:
I’m gone for a second.

There goes the neighborhood.  

It’s worse than it is.

To his nevertheless extensive oeuvre
belongs also this diversionary maneuvere.

What doesn’t know
and doesn’t show,
is parked here below.

                              Knight at the crossroads, Viktor Mikhailovich Vasnetsov, 1882

Multilingual jokes
Which in written language expresses a certain meaning, but spoken phonetically, expresses something totally different in another language
English: “What did it generate”
Dutch: “Gene reet.”
 
English: “Jazz, Blues, Rock.”  (music styles)
Dutch: “Jas, Bloes, Rok.” (Clothing) 

English: “Worst case scenario,”
Dutch: “Worst kaas scenario.”

French: “Maillot,”
Dutch: “Malloot.”

Absurdisms
Cleavage / décolleté : “Silicon valley”
(And I always thought that Silicon valley was in the San Francisco bay area).

One-word jokes
Jobsatisfaction.

Echo
Do you have a job? Job.

How much? Much

Re-names  (Who’s Who?)
Gringo Starr

Not that
Plato: Greek philosopher, not the high heeled shoes (plateau)

Broccoli: The vegetables, not the movie producer 

Mandarin: The high Chinese state official, not the subtropical fruit

Combinatione
The eternal flame and the fire-extinguisher

Stonehenge and the bulldozer  

The soap bubble and the cactus  

From – to
Use it – Lose it
Taoism – Maoism
Clever – Never 
Error –  Terror
Clinical – Cynical
Tourist – terrorist
Slogans – fast guns
Rasputin – Putin 

Ridicolosamente or ridicolo musical
Humorously, inaccurate, and loosely.
My Bonnie is over the ocean
My Money is over the ocean

Family name
Cult – diffi
Holism – alco
Tine – Nico
Hilation – Annie
Kafsluiter – Stan
Stocrat  – Ari
Eficiation – Ben
Pulent – Cor
Rupter – Cor
Tator – Dick
Ono – Kim
Eting – Mark
Sticated –Sophie

Stutter
Funk….tional
Fun….est
Fun….damentalist
Fun….ding

To use military terminology out of context to describe social situations
Alimony: Recovery payments after the termination of the combat operations.

Meta humour
Freud wrote a study about humour: “Der Witz”
This book didn’t contain even one joke.

Professions

P.R. manager: soap bubble merchant

Psychiatrist: Disaster tourist
(Psychoanalysis: Tales from the dark side)

                                                              The subconscious

Double ambiguity 
Saints and sinners
Losers and winners

Sold the last one yesterday
A turtleneck sweater for a giraffe,

a brake booster for a turtle.

Superlative
Subtropical, Tropical, Philanthropical
Exist, Sexist, Exorcist. 

Trio
Pipo, Chipo and Creepo. 

Mime
A form of comedy that doesn’t misuse the spoken language.

Incongruity: the state of being incongruous; incompatibility.
Present day, now: No man’s land, the shifting border between the radiant smile of the future and the gray, harsh grin of the past.

Kettle logic
The original example given by Freud is one where a man is accused to returning a kettle he borrowed from a neighbour in damaged condition and he then uses 3 arguments to defend himself:

1. He returned the kettle undamaged.
2. The kettle was already damaged when he borrowed it.
3. He never borrowed the kettle.

Nonsense Questions:
What is longer, an hour or a kilometer?

How long does the half of eternity last?

Philosophical
I’m no longer who I never was.

Nudist humour: The new clothes of the emperor. 

Political jokes
The people we chose to represent us in our government.

Repetition   Jazz show, cash flow and hash blow.

Rhyme: A special case of assonance is rhyme, in which the endings of words (generally beginning with the vowel sound of the last stressed syllable) are identical
A compulsive neurosis in which a patient uses the written language or the spoken word only when the words or  sentences end with a sound that corresponds to another.

“Flower from heaven, light from above,
your gentle smile fills our hearts with love
Your wings may be hidden, but we know they are there,
we search for your presence. in times of despair
Your footsteps  tread gently, your voice it is kind,
The dance of your soul brings eyesight to the blind
I’m just an old poet who is close to the grave,
then I throw away life’s shackles, like a Nubian slave
So, if you travel on life’s road far ahead
please do remember, that once we did met.”
                                                                       Marinus Jan Marijs.

Punky, Funky and Junky

Photogenic: Make-up and D-cup

Initials
B. Asterd
D. bacle
E.P. demic
D. linquent
M. bryo
D. spot
D. tainee

Allegorical exegesis
Exegesis is a critical explanation or interpretation of a text, particularly a religious text.
Baloney: Allegorical exegesis of the concept of respectability.

Polyvalent logic
Lying, cheating, deceiving, double-dealing, fraud, embezzlement, deception, swindling, falsification, bamboozling, ………

Contradictio in terminis
An important football match

A trustworthy politician   

Multiple choice
A Libyan terrorist or a lesbian tourist

If it……
If it’s green, it’s flora
If it moves, it is fauna
If it makes noise, it’s a fuga.
If it doesn’t function its mechanics
If you can make explosive devices of it, its physics 

Phonetic:    French:          Bouquet (flora)

                     American:     Book it    (agency)

                     Irish:              Beckett   (writer)

                     English:         Bucket    (content)

                     Dutch:            Bake it    (culinary)

                     Wall street:    Budget    (monetary)

The Flynn effect
The Flynn effect is the substantial and long-sustained increase in intelligence test scores that were measured in many parts of the world over the 20th century.
The effect was about 2.93 points per decade, based on both Stanford–Binet and Wechsler tests
Our IQ levels are higher than those of our grandparents.
A similar effect has been found with increases related to physical strength, while we can easily carry for about 50 dollars’ worth of groceries, our grandparents  could only carry for about 10 dollars’ worth of groceries.    

Job description:
1. Fleet commander on a rowing boat

                  The Wrath of the Seas, 1886, Ivan Konstantinovich Aivazovsky (1817 – 1900)

2. Director of thunderstorms

3. Ruler of remote galaxies

Broken:
Broken promises, give
Broken hearts, give
Broken table ware of
Broken white

Retro causal
Memories of the future

Book: “Back in time” 1^st print 1998, 2^th print 1996, 3^th print 1994

Cloven:
the language of a politician
the personality of an actor
the interests of an traitor
the philosophy of the nihilist
the path of life of the hedonist
the critic’s hooves

Geometry
Doctrine about vicious circles and warning triangles,
dealing with the question of how many angles a circle has and what the difference is between a straight line and an angle of one hundred eighty degrees

Oval: circle with anorexia

Ignorantia
Lacking knowledge or awareness in general; uneducated or unsophisticated.
Uneducated, unknowledgeable, untaught, unschooled, untutored, untrained, illiterate, unlettered, unlearned, unread, uninformed, unenlightened, unscholarly, unqualified, benighted, backward; inexperienced, unworldly, unsophisticated; unintelligent, stupid, simple, empty-headed, mindless; informal pig-ignorant, thick, airheaded, (as) thick as two short planks, dense, dumb, dim, dopey, wet behind the ears, slow on the uptake, dead from the neck up, a brick short of a load, two sandwiches short of a picnic
But other than that there was nothing wrong with him. 

All-one or alone
Solidary or solitary

Etymological
Adult: Etymologically traceable to Adultery 

Job: Work, Career, Employment, Occupation, Profession.
Etymologically traceable to a heavily plagued Old Testament figure who was tormented by severe diseases, under the ulcers and lived on a garbage dump covered with ash.

                                              Ilya Repin 1844 –1930 Job and his friends

Singular – Plural form
Jup – Club 

Life
A assembly of tribulations,

Carnival of fools

                               “Carnival on the Central Boulevard” (1886) François Gailliard

Life has two phases:
The first, in which you don’t have what you want,
the  second, in which you don’t want what you have. 

Interdisciplinary
Lying:   The professional language of politicians

              The terminology of the novelists

              The jargon of the advertisers

              The tools of the journalists

Journalists don’t describe a situation as it is,
but how it should be.

 Multifarious Analyses
Thinking:
Exceeds our authorizations,
A vulgar display that points to a twisted emotional life,
A disgrace,
Does not fall within the scope of my job description,
Not really an agenda item,
Not my field of expertise,
Curiosity shop,
A completely different theme,
Frivol eccentricity,
High treason,
A very disturbing development,
Are you saving that for a special occasion?
Disruption of the public order.
In violation of the protocol,
Obstructing the course of justice and engaging in criminal activity,
Don’t do that because you will wear and tear out your mind,
A very serious mistake,
Unworthy behavior,
A danger to society,
An academic eccentricity,
Well, there is a first time for everything,
Characteristic of a vulgar spirit,
Very suspicious maneuver,
Excessive frivolousness,
Gross Indecency,
The dark gift.

 Pseudo-logical
Two plus two is four

Two multiply with two is four

Conclusion: plus equals multiply

(A syllogism (Greek: συλλογισμός syllogismos, “conclusion, inference”) is a kind of logical argument that applies deductive reasoning to arrive at a conclusion based on two or more propositions that are asserted or assumed to be true)

Here below is a rigorous mathematical formulation:  ↓
              2 + 2 = 4
              2 x 2 = 4
                 + = x

Political
Marxism: Groucho, Harpo, Chico, Gummo and Zeppo. 

International
Spanish: Los triumfos des idiotos

Italian: il figura pathetico

English: Total eclipse of the loon

Latin: ignoramus debielus

German: Adolph von Patzenhoffer

Dutch: Dementendrai

Modern: relating to the present or recent times as opposed to the remote past.
From clinical to cynical
(A cynic is a blind man who is afraid of the dark)

Pleonasm: the use of more words than are necessary to convey meaning, either as a fault of style or for emphasis.
Wedding drama,

Dark black,

Shameless politicians,

False hope

Unwarranted optimism,

Forced labor,

Unhealthy interest,

War crime

Ridiculising:  from the serene clarity of reason, with the compelling evidence of the mathematical disciplines, to come to a positive end result, with lyrical compositions of extraordinary poetic power.

Antithesis (Greek for “setting opposite) is used in writing or speech either as a proposition that contrasts with or reverses some previously mentioned proposition, or when two opposites are introduced together for contrasting effect. The is based on the logical phrase or term.
Tabula rasa – criminal record

Theological
Was the devil invented by the priests,
or the priests by the devil?

                                      Holy Week in Seville, 1879 | Josè Jimenez Y Aranda

 Physics
That space and time are theoretical abstractions,
is a theoretical abstraction

Time
Time doesn’t exist, I have been exclaiming that for years

Time: The stream of disillusionment,
through the landscape of oblivion. 

Mythical

The mermaid: the missing link of the evolution theory.

The phoenix: In Greek mythology, a phoenix is a long-lived bird that cyclically dies, goes up into flames and is reborn again. On the other hand,  it loses its no-claim bonus 

Third wave feminism
Proposed law: women with double D-cup become protected townscape
and men with beer bellies fall within the category horizon-pollution

Numerical:
Sufficient = everything  X  1,1

Spending pattern: income X 1.2

Movie star: has 4 ex-wives, 5 houses, 6. Cars and 7 egos.

Seven miles boots: 11. kilometres, 265. metres and 408. millimetres boots

 Ridicule riddles 
Where are the east- and the west-pole?
…. In Poland perhaps?

Art form
Business: the noble art of converting unscrupulousness into hard currency 

Disguise
Frugality: stinginess disguised as virtue

England
They play sports as if it is a war, and war as if it is a sport

They live across the sea, nevertheless they think that it’s us who live across the sea 

The nine o’clock news is at ten o’clock 

Annie is a girl’s name, but in England everybody is Any

The Nile is a river in Egypt, but the English deny that

                            A view of Luxor on the Nile By Frank Dillon – British ,1823-1909

Eponym An eponym is a person, place, or thing after whom or after which something is named, or believed to be named.
Anna Boleyn: the second wife of King Henry VIII,
inventor of the muscle-enhancing agents: the anabolic steroids

Industry: Is named after a river in India, the Indus, where there is no industry of any importance.

Motorized
The great Hebrew King David, he had a son called Harley

Safe
Vaccinated against earthquakes, lightning and floods

                                       Edwin Deakin  Despair, July 10, 1906   Earthquake
                                                                               +

                                                        Francesco Giuseppe Casanova
                                             +

Ivan Aivazovsky (July 29, 1817 – May 5, 1900)

Cyclic shift
Het zielige van de geestelijke,
De geestigheid van de humorist,
De humor van de zielepoot,
Het potige van de krachtpatser,
Het patserige van de rijkaard,
Het aardige van de goede ziel.
A:B=B:C=C:D=D:E=E:F=F:A

Self-mockery: Disrespectful behaviour towards an outstanding person

The use of formal language to describe an informal situation.
Stealing: Expropriation procedure.

                                             Carl Gustaf Hellqvist  1851- 1890   Sweden

Color code:
Red: Color of eyes and bank accounts.
Orange-red: Colour of passed traffic lights.
Yellow snow: Don’t eat…..
Green: jealousy, also available in other colours.
Blue: Drunk, see: Dark blue.
Violet: Is that you own hair colour?
Gray: The Netherlands, painted impressionistically

Adagium.
A concise, memorable, and usually philosophical aphorism which communicates an important truth derived from experience, custom, or both, and which is considered true and credible because of its tradition of being handed down from generation to generation. Adages are often interesting observations, ethical rules, or skeptical comments on life in general.
Through the landscape of the political wriggling
flows the river of shame

Allegory A type of writing in which the settings, characters, and events stand for other specific people, events, or ideas.
In a land without dragons, everybody is a dragon slayer.

Anachronism The erroneous use of an object, event, idea, or word that does not belong to the same time period as its context
Anachronism: Trustworthiness, decency and integrity within the 21th century

Anagnorisis The point in a plot at which a character recognizes the true state of affairs.
Nihilist: A midlife crisis is an existential emergency in which a sublime insight manifests, that life doesn’t make sense nor has any utility.

Analogy
A comparison between two things that are otherwise unlike.
He has no heart, but a circulation pump.

In rhetoric, Antimetabole is the repetition of words in successive clauses, but in transposed order; for example, “I know what I like, and I like what I know”. It is related to, and sometimes considered a special case of, chiasmus.
An antimetabole is also said to be a little too predictive because it is easy to reverse the key term, but it can pose questions that one usually would not think of if the phrase were just asked or said the initial way.
Militarism: Not a system in the madness, but madness in the system.

                                               Franz Alekseevich Roubaud (1856-1928).

Epistrophe (Greek: “return”) is the repetition of the same word or words at the end of successive phrases, clauses or sentences. It is also known as epiphora and occasionally as antistrophe. It is a figure of speech and the counterpart of anaphora. It is an extremely emphatic device because of the emphasis placed on the last word in a phrase or sentence.
Where stupidity bear rule,
where reason is subdued,
where honesty is subdued,
where good will is subdued,
and everything else that’s insanity, is renewed.

The term antonym (and the related antonymy) is commonly taken to be synonymous with opposite, but antonym also has other more restricted meanings. Graded (or gradable) antonyms are word pairs whose meanings are opposite and which lie on a continuous spectrum (hot, cold).
Man is the silver ball in the pinball machine of life.

An aphorism is a concise, terse, laconic, and/or memorable expression of a general truth or principle.
Life is hard, but the drugs are harder.

An apologue or apolog (from the Greek a “statement” or “account”) is a brief fable or allegorical story with pointed or exaggerated details, meant to serve as a pleasant vehicle for a moral doctrine or to convey a useful lesson without stating it explicitly. Unlike a fable, the moral is more important than the narrative details. As with the parable, the apologue is a tool of rhetorical argument used to convince or persuade.
Ali Mony and the forty thieves

Apologetics (from Greek “speaking in defense”) is the religious discipline of defending religious doctrines through systematic argumentation and discourse.
“You now have enough air miles to go to heaven,
You can exchange your asbestos suit and fire extinguisher for a harp at the cloakroom.”

Arcadia refers to a vision of pastoralism and harmony with nature. The term is derived from the Greek province of the same name which dates to antiquity; the province’s mountainous topography and sparse population of pastoralists later caused the word Arcadia to develop into a poetic byword for an idyllic vision of unspoiled wilderness. Arcadia is a poetic shaped space associated with bountiful natural splendor and harmony.
The future: The metropolis of dreams,
the crystal garden of hope,
the golden road to fulfillment,
the glorious sea of ​​light.

This in contrast to:

The past: The valley of tears,
the sea of ​​disillusion,
the sarcophagus of all hope.

In logic and philosophy, an argument is a series of statements (in a natural language), called the premises or premisses (both spellings are acceptable), intended to determine the degree of truth of another statement, the conclusion.
That rain only falls outside and not inside is a proposition that skeptics strongly doubt.
Skeptics argue that this position is based upon indirect evidence, since the witness statements were made by the members of the sect of homeless people, who in no way have the authority to express an opinion in this regard.

(See: Shower).

Asyndeton (from the Greek: “unconnected”, sometimes called asyndetism) is a literary scheme in which one or several conjunctions are deliberately omitted from a series of related clauses. Examples include
veni, vidi, vici and its English translation “I came, I saw, I conquered”. Its use can have the effect of speeding up the rhythm of a passage and making a single idea more memorable. Asyndeton may be contrasted with syndeton (syndetic coordination) and polysyndeton, which describe the use of one or multiple coordinating conjunctions, respectively.
I came, I saw, I perished

The avant-garde from French, “advance guard” or “vanguard”, literally “fore-guard”) are people or works that are experimental, radical, or unorthodox with respect to art, culture, or society. It may be characterized by non-traditional, aesthetic innovation and initial unacceptability, and it may offer a critique of the relationship between producer and consumer. The avant-garde pushes the boundaries of what is accepted as the norm or the status quo, primarily in the cultural realm.
Rainbow: Just as everything is beautifully painted in gray primer, you get that.

Bathos is a literary term, coined by Alexander Pope in his 1727 essay “Peri Bathous”, to describe amusingly failed attempts at sublimity (i.e., pathos). In particular, bathos is associated with anti-climax, an abrupt transition from a lofty style or grand topic to a common or vulgar one. This may be either accidental (through artistic ineptitude) or intentional (for comic effect). Intentional bathos appears in satirical genres such as burlesque and mock epic. “Bathos” or “bathetic” is also used for similar effects in other branches of the arts, such as musical passages marked ridicolosamente. In film, bathos may appear in a contrast cut intended for comic relief or be produced by an accidental jump cut.
Tired are my feet, tired is my heart
You can put the whole of life in your ass for my part.

Belles-lettres is a category of writing, originally meaning beautiful or fine writing. In the modern narrow sense, it is a label for literary works that do not fall into the major categories such as fiction, poetry, or drama. The phrase is sometimes used pejoratively for writing that focuses on the aesthetic qualities of language rather than its practical application. Literally, belles-lettres is a French phrase meaning “beautiful” or “fine” writing.
Shakespearian: Before one slashes through someone with a sword, one does first reprimand this person for fifteen minutes in standing rhyme.

                                        Salvador Sánchez Barbudo  (1857–1917)  Hamlet

A calligram is text arranged in such a way that it forms a thematically related image. It can be a poem, a phrase, a portion of scripture, or a single word; the visual arrangement can rely on certain use of the typeface, calligraphy or handwriting, for instance along non-parallel and curved text lines, or in shaped paragraphs. The image created by the words illustrates the text by expressing visually what it says, or something closely associated; it can also, on purpose, show something contradictory with the text or otherwise misleading.

Afbeelding Scannen

Characterisation
Lunatic: Meets the description / signalement  

Carpe diem is a Latin aphorism, usually translated “seize the day”, taken from book 1 of the Roman poet Horace’s work Odes (23 BC).

Carpe is the second-person singular present active imperative of carpō “pick or pluck” used by Horace to mean “enjoy, seize, make use of”. Diem is the accusative of dies “day”. A more literal translation of carpe diem would thus be “pluck the day [as it is ripe]”—that is, enjoy the moment.
“Truth may be a strange and foreign land,
   but I see the footprints in the sand.”

In literature, a caricature is a description of a person using exaggeration of some characteristics and oversimplification of others.
Husband: Illustrious person who is found worthy to put the trashcan outside.

Catachresis (from Greek “abuse”), originally meaning a semantic misuse or error—e.g., using “militate” for “mitigate”, “chronic” for “severe”, “travesty” for “tragedy”, “anachronism” for “anomaly”, “alibi” for “excuse”, etc.—is also the name given to many different types of figures of speech in which a word or phrase is being applied in a way that significantly departs from conventional (or traditional) usage.
Hurry and worry

In drama, particularly the tragedies of classical antiquity, the catastrophe is the final resolution in a poem or narrative plot, which unravels the intrigue and brings the piece to a close. In comedies, this may be a marriage between main characters; in tragedies, it may be the death of one or more main characters. It is the final part of a play, following the protasis, epitasis, and catastasis.
Mirror: The portrait of an exceptionally reprehensible creature of very questionable variety.
This portrait magically appears when a mindless person displays his shameless curiosity by posing for what is depicted. The image disappears mysteriously as soon as the viewer turns away in horror.

Catastrophization: view or present a situation as considerably worse than it actually is.
Nihilism: A domain devoid of meaning or coherence. Going on streets of despair, through a landscape of desolation, in gloomy regions of melancholy, along ruins of futility, in the metropolis of insignificance.

Catharsis (from Greek meaning “purification” or “cleansing” or “clarification”) is, e.g., the purification and purgation of emotions—particularly pity and fear—through art or any extreme change in emotion that results in renewal and restoration. It is a metaphor originally used by Aristotle in the Poetics, comparing the effects of tragedy on the mind of a spectator to the effect of catharsis on the body.
Brake: Object that is used by less audacious people who are too much attached to life.

A chronicle is a historical account of facts and events arranged in chronological order, as in a time line. Typically, equal weight is given for historically important events and local events, the purpose being the recording of events that occurred, seen from the perspective of the chronicler. This is in contrast to a narrative or history, which sets selected events in a meaningful interpretive context and excludes those the author does not see as important.
Ups and downs, Jippie and Dippie

A cliché or cliche is an expression, idea, or element of an artistic work which has become overused to the point of losing its original meaning or effect, even to the point of being trite or irritating, especially when at some earlier time it was considered meaningful or novel. 
“Over my dead body”
Okay, we can arrange that.

In literature, confessional writing is a first-person style that is often presented as an ongoing diary or letters, distinguished by revelations of a person’s deeper or darker motivations. Originally, the term derived from confession: The writer is not only autobiographically recounting his life, but confessing to his sins.
Guilty as charged, Mea culpa, Amende Honorable.

Consonance is a stylistic literary device identified by the repetition of identical or similar consonants in neighbouring words whose vowel sounds are different  Consonance may be regarded as the counterpart to the vowel-sound repetition known as assonance.
A sociopath is a rude dude.

Alliteration is a special case of consonance where the repeated consonant sound is at the stressed syllable, as in “few flocked to the fight” or “around the rugged rock the ragged rascal ran”. Alliteration is usually distinguished from other types of consonance in poetic analysis, and has different uses and effects.
Workaholic: Fanatism für fortgestrittene.

Contradiction An idea that is self-refuting or otherwise paradoxical is ironic.
Platypus: A mammal that lays eggs, a sort of an Easter bunny.

In semiotics, linguistics, sociology and anthropology, context refers to those objects or entities which surround a focal event, in these disciplines typically a communicative event, of some kind. Context is “a frame that surrounds the event and provides resources for its appropriate interpretation”
Sixties:
Amerika  :  Hippie
Europa    :  Pippi
Australia :  Skippy

Cynical Humour concerned only with one’s own interests and typically disregarding accepted standards in order to achieve them
All Good people die young,
You and I shall live to be very old

The death poem is a genre of poetry that developed in the literary traditions of East Asian cultures—most prominently in Japan as well as certain periods of Chinese history and Joseon Korea. They tend to offer a reflection on death—both in general and concerning the imminent death of the author—that is often coupled with a meaningful observation on life. The practice of writing a death poem has its origins in Zen Buddhism. It is a concept or worldview derived from the Buddhist teaching of the three marks of existence, specifically that the material world is transient and impermanent, that attachment to it causes suffering, and ultimately all reality is an emptiness or absence of self-nature. These poems became associated with the literate, spiritual, and ruling segments of society, as they were customarily composed by a poet, warrior, nobleman, or Buddhist monk.

The writing of a poem at the time of one’s death and reflecting on the nature of death in an impermanent, transitory world is unique to East Asian culture. It has close ties with Buddhism, and particularly the mystical Zen Buddhism (of Japan),
Hear the troubadour who sings,
about the funeral bell that rings,
and the finitude of things.

Les Voix du Tocsin    Albert Maignan (1845-1908)

The word decadence, which at first meant simply “decline” in an abstract sense, is now most often used to refer to a perceived decay in standards, morals, dignity, religious faith, or skill at governing among the members of the elite of a very large social structure, such as an empire or nation state. By extension, it may refer to a decline in art, literature, science, technology, and work ethics, or (very loosely) to self-indulgent behaviour.
Hero, Nero and Zero.

Bad,   Mad  and  Sad.

Decorum (from the Latin: “right, proper”) was a principle of classical rhetoric, poetry and theatrical theory that was about the fitness or otherwise of a style to a theatrical subject. The concept of decorum is also applied to prescribed limits of appropriate social behaviour within set situations.
To be able to pick your nose, you must be in possession of a exploitation permit.
(a mining license)

Deus ex machina A plot device whereby a seemingly unsolvable problem in a story is suddenly resolved by an unexpected and seemingly unlikely occurrence, typically so much as to seem contrived.
Diet cookie: a round cookie with a diameter of seven centimeters, and in the middle a hole of eight centimeters.

Didactic art was meant both to entertain and to instruct. Didactic plays, for instance, were intended to convey a moral theme or other rich truth to the audience.
Perhaps it is advisable to buy your books at a second-hand bookstore; they have been read already so you don’t have to do that.

Digression is a section of a composition or speech that marks a temporary shift of subject; the digression ends when the writer or speaker returns to the main topic. Digressions can be used intentionally as a stylistic or rhetorical device. 
Regret: A clarification of the situation that has been implemented too far.

“The only thing you get for nothing nowadays, is regret.”

A dystopia (from Ancient Greek “bad” and  “place”; alternatively, cacotopia, kakotopia, or simply anti-utopia) is a community or society that is undesirable or frightening. It is translated as “not-good place” and is an antonym of utopia, a term that was coined by Sir Thomas More and figures as the title of his best known work, Utopia, published 1516, a blueprint for an ideal society with minimal crime, violence and poverty. Dystopias are often characterized by dehumanization, tyrannical governments, environmental disaster, or other characteristics associated with a cataclysmic decline in society. 
(Le Convoy Exceptionnel)

In English literature, an elegy is a poem of serious reflection, usually a lament for the dead.
When the birds no longer fly,
and politicians no longer lie,
and memories are barely floating,
the end of the world is approaching.

An epic poem, epic, epos, or epopee is a lengthy narrative poem, ordinarily involving a time beyond living memory in which occurred the extraordinary doings of the extraordinary men and women who, in dealings with the gods or other superhuman forces, gave shape to the moral universe that their descendants, the poet and his audience, must understand to understand themselves as a people or nation.
Epos: Heroic epic.
Curriculum vitae of the first person singular.

An epiphany (from the ancient Greek epiphaneia, “manifestation, striking appearance”) is an experience of a sudden and striking realization. Generally the term is used to describe scientific breakthrough, religious or philosophical discoveries, but it can apply in any situation in which an enlightening realization allows a problem or situation to be understood from a new and deeper perspective. Epiphanies are studied by psychologists and other scholars, particularly those attempting to study the process of innovation
Feeling of shame: Invasion by a foreign occupation force.

“Episteme” is a philosophical term derived from the Ancient Greek word which can refer to knowledge, science or understanding, and which comes from the verb “to know, to understand, or to be acquainted with”. 
Crazy: We have encountered unexpected difficulties when drawing up an explanatory model for your behavior.

                                      Adrien Moreau   (18 April 1843 – 22 February 1906)

An epitaph (from Greek “a funeral oration” from “at, over” and “tomb”)
 is a short text honoring a deceased person. Strictly speaking, it refers to text that is inscribed on a tombstone or plaque, but it may also be used in a figurative sense. Some epitaphs are specified by the person themselves before their death, while others are chosen by those responsible for the burial. An epitaph may be written in prose or in poem verse.
He was so exceptionally aggressive, that if he would have been stationed at the Maginot Line in France in 1940, those 10 German armored divisions would never have been able to pass through.

An epithet (from Greek: epitheton, neuter of epithetos, “attributed, added”) is a byname, or a descriptive term (word or phrase), accompanying or occurring in place of a name and having entered common usage. It has various shades of meaning when applied to seemingly real or fictitious people, divinities, objects, and binomial nomenclature. It can also be a descriptive title: for example, Pallas Athena, Alfred the Great, Suleiman the Magnificent or Władysław I the Elbow-high.

In contemporary use, epithet often refers to an abusive, defamatory, or derogatory phrase, such as a racial or animal epithet. This use as a euphemism is criticized by Martin Manser and other proponents of linguistic prescription.
Bertrand Russell  –  Brussel

In rhetoric, an epizeuxis is the repetition of a word or phrase in immediate succession, typically within the same sentence, for vehemence or emphasis. A closely related rhetorical device is diacope, which involves word repetition that is broken up by a single intervening word, or a small number of intervening words. As a rhetorical device, epizeuxis is utilized to create an emotional appeal, thereby inspiring and motivating the audience. However, epizeuxis can also be used for comic effect.
“Never give in — never, never, never, never say Never.”

A eulogy (from eulogia, Classical Greek, eu for “well” or “true”, logia for “words” or “text”, together for “praise”) is a speech or writing in praise of a person(s) or thing(s), especially one who recently died or retired or as a term of endearment.
Disrespect: This was the central idea within the philosophy of the American existentialist philosopher Rodney Dangerfield.

Exaggeration is a representation of something in an excessive manner.
You have more stuff than the American Army.

A fairy tale, wonder tale, magic tale, or Märchen is an instance of a folklore genre that takes the form of a short story. Such stories typically feature entities such as dwarfs, dragons, elves, fairies, giants, gnomes, goblins, griffins, mermaids, talking animals, trolls, unicorns, or witches, and usually magic or enchantments.,

Alexandre-Louis Leloir (1843 – 1884) Chariot Of Swallows

For modern fairy tales see:
Advertising, newspapers and political party programs.
Other than Anderson and grimmer than Grimm.

A flashback (sometimes called an analepsis) is an interjected scene that takes the narrative back in time from the current point in the story.
If you write down in your diary where you put it away,
you can find it much easier later.

An obscenity is any utterance or act that strongly offends the prevalent morality of the time. It is derived from the Latin obscaena (offstage) a cognate of the Ancient Greek root skene, because some potentially offensive content, such as murder or sex, was depicted offstage in classical drama. The word can be used to indicate a strong moral repugnance, in expressions such as “obscene profits” or “the obscenity of war”. As a legal term, it usually refers to graphic depictions of people engaged in sexual and excretory activity.
Enjoys our undivided attention.

Gag: a joke that is misunderstood, because it’s written backwards. 

The genetic fallacy (also known as the fallacy of origins or fallacy of virtue) is a fallacy of irrelevance that is based solely on someone’s or something’s history, origin, or source rather than its current meaning or context. This overlooks any difference to be found in the present situation, typically transferring the positive or negative esteem from the earlier context. In other words, a claim is ignored in favor of attacking its source.

The fallacy therefore fails to assess the claim on its merit. The first criterion of a good argument is that the premises must have bearing on the truth or falsity of the claim in question. Genetic accounts of an issue may be true, and they may help illuminate the reasons why the issue has assumed its present form, but they are not conclusive in determining its merits.

If sewer workers have difficulty recognizing the dignity of their workplace, than why don’t politicians have the same problem?

Gonzo journalism is a style of journalism that is written without claims of objectivity, often including the reporter as part of the story via a first-person narrative.
a: “Do you know that there are more than one and a half billion Chinese people?”
b: “Oh yes?”
a: “Yes.”
b: “Then, name two….”

Elite level stupidity

A hagiography (from Ancient Greek, hagios, meaning ‘holy’, and -graphia, meaning ‘writing’) is a biography of a saint or an ecclesiastical leader. The term hagiography may be used to refer to the biography of a saint or highly developed spiritual being in any of the world’s spiritual traditions.
(See: Autobiography).

High comedy or pure comedy is a type of comedy characterized by witty dialogue, satire, biting humour, or criticism of life. The term High Comedy was coined in England in 1877 by George Meredith for his Essay on Comedy.
Through the landscape of vanity flows the river of stupidity.

Hubris  describes a personality quality of extreme or foolish pride or dangerous overconfidence, often in combination with (or synonymous with) arrogance. In its ancient Greek context, it typically describes behaviour that defies the norms of behavior or challenges the gods, and which in turn brings about the downfall, or nemesis, of the perpetrator of hubris.

The adjectival form of the noun hubris is “hubristic”. Hubris is usually perceived as a characteristic of an individual rather than a group, although the group the offender belongs to may suffer collateral consequences from the wrongful act. Hubris often indicates a loss of contact with reality and an overestimation of one’s own competence, accomplishments or capabilities.
I am lucky that I am me, and not you.

Maxim: an instructional expression of a general principle or rule of morality
Wisdom goes on foot, but stupidity is motorized.

 Self-defeating humour. People with this style of humour tend to amuse others by using self-disparaging jokes, and also tend to laugh along with others when being taunted. It is hypothesised that people use this style of humour as a mean of social acceptance. It is also mentioned that these people may have an implicit feeling of negativity. So they use this humour as a means of hiding that inner negative feeling.
Fool? No, I have been rejected for that.


The pun, also called paronomasia, is a form of word play that exploits multiple meanings of a term, or of similar-sounding words, for an intended humorous or rhetorical effect.
Someone who stands with both legs on the ground
doesn’t get one step ahead.

Homophonic
The homophonic pun, a common type, uses word pairs which sound alike (homophones) but are not synonymous.
You must have a heart for the business,
the business is also hard for you.

Homographic
A homographic pun exploits words which are spelled the same (homographs) but possess different meanings and sounds. Because of their nature, they rely on sight more than hearing, contrary to homophonic puns. They are also known as heteronymic puns.
Dustin Hoffman – Dust in the wind.

Compounded
A compound pun is a statement that contains two or more puns. In this case, the wordplay cannot go into effect by utilizing the separate words or phrases of the puns that make up the entire statement.
Portraits   –   Poor traits

Recursive
A recursive pun is one in which the second aspect of a pun relies on the understanding of an element in the first.
The generation gap
Degeneration gap

In the social sciences, framing comprises a set of concepts and theoretical perspectives on how individuals, groups, and societies, organize, perceive, and communicate about reality.
Framing can manifest in thought or interpersonal communication. Frames in thought consist of the mental representations, interpretations, and simplifications of reality. Frames in communication consist of the communication of frames between different actors.
In social theory, framing is a schema of interpretation, a collection of anecdotes and stereotypes, that individuals rely on to understand and respond to events. In other words, people build a series of mental “filters” through biological and cultural influences. They then use these filters to make sense of the world. The choices they then make are influenced by their creation of a frame.
Framing: Art of the logical reasoning, a philosophical treatise with lyrical poetic reflections, virtuosic turns of thought, brilliantly clever analyzes, inspired metaphysical teachings with irrefutable arguments.

Comic timing is the use of rhythm, tempo, and pausing to enhance comedy and humour. The pacing of the delivery of a joke can have a strong impact on its comedic effect, even altering its meaning; the same can also be true of more physical comedy such as slapstick.
Trying to tell a joke before you die.

             José Moreno Carbonero (1858 – 1942) Entrada de Roger de Flor en Constantinopla

Hello old chap,…. the doctor just called,.. you died an hour ago.

Hypallage (from the Greek: hypalla “interchange, exchange”) is a figure of speech in which the syntactic relationship between two terms is interchanged, or—more frequently—a modifier is syntactically linked to an item other than the one that it modifies semantically. The latter type of hypallage, typically resulting in the implied personification of an inanimate or abstract noun, is also called a transferred epithet.
The restless hill, (couldn’t be a volcano). 

Indeterminacy in literature is a situation in which components of a text require the reader to make their own decisions about the text’s meaning.
Life is an exciting but disputable joke,
the point of which isn’t entirely clear.

In contrast to typical words and sentences, the function of most interjections is related to an expression of feeling, rather than representing some idea or concept. Generally, interjections can be classified into three types of meaning: volitive, emotive, or cognitive.

• Volitive interjections function as imperative or directive expressions, requesting or demanding something from the addressee (e.g. “Shh!” = “Be quiet!”).
• Emotive interjections are used to express emotions, such as disgust and fear (e.g. “Yuck!” = disgust).
• Cognitive interjections express feelings which are more related to cognition, or information known to the speaker of the utterance (e.g. “Wow!” = surprise).

While there exists some apparent overlap between emotive and cognitive interjections, as both express a feeling, cognitive interjections can be seen as more related to knowledge of something (i.e. information previously known to the speaker, or recently learned).
Wow or Auw.

A jeremiad is a long literary work, usually in prose, but sometimes in verse, in which the author bitterly laments the state of society and its morals in a serious tone of sustained invective, and always contains a prophecy of society’s imminent downfall.
Lamentation: Damage report in which the elusive dimensions of reality are adequately expressed.

A fallacy is the use of invalid or otherwise faulty reasoning, or “wrong moves” in the construction of an argument. A fallacious argument may be deceptive by appearing to be better than it really is. Some fallacies are committed intentionally to manipulate or persuade by deception, while others are committed unintentionally due to carelessness or ignorance. The soundness of legal arguments depends on the context in which the arguments are made.

Fallacies are commonly divided into “formal” and “informal”. A formal fallacy can be expressed neatly in a standard system of logic, such as propositional logic, while an informal fallacy originates in an error in reasoning other than an improper logical form. Arguments containing informal fallacies may be formally valid, but still fallacious.
Quantity:
a: “Is it the first or the second?”

b: “Yes, indeed.”

Low comedy, in association to comedy, is a dramatic or literary form of popular entertainment with no primary purpose other than to create laughter through boasting, boisterous jokes, drunkenness, scolding, fighting, buffoonery and other riotous activity. It is also characterized by “horseplay”, slapstick or farce. Examples include the throwing of a custard pie into another’s face.
A form of obscenity, that enquires our serious attention.

Macaronic language is text that uses a mixture of languages, particularly bilingual puns or situations in which the languages are otherwise used in the same context (rather than simply discrete segments of a text being in different languages). Hybrid words are effectively “internally macaronic”. In spoken language, code-switching is using more than one language or dialect within the same conversation.
Pseudo-English: “Set the blue man in the phase.”
                    Dutch: “Zet de bloemen in de vaas.”

Dunglish (portmanteau of Dutch and English; in Dutch steenkolenengels, literally: “coal-English”) is a popular term for mistakes native Dutch speakers make when trying to speak English. The term’s usage is loosely connected to that of other English language corruptions, such as Engrish.
“Don’t take me in the mailing.”

Magical realism, magic realism, or marvelous realism is a style of fiction that paints a realistic view of the modern world while also adding magical elements. It is sometimes called fabulism, in reference to the conventions of fables, myths, and allegory. “Magical realism”, perhaps the most common term, often refers to fiction and literature in particular, with magic or the supernatural presented in an otherwise real-world or mundane setting
Tyrannosaurus Rex: The preposterous superstition among paleontologists that dragons actually existed.

A malapropism (also called a malaprop or Dogberryism) is the use of an incorrect word in place of a word with a similar sound, resulting in a nonsensical, sometimes humorous utterance.

Humorous malapropisms are the type that attract the most attention and commentary, but bland malapropisms are common in speech and writing.

An instance of speech error is called a malapropism when a word is produced which is nonsensical or ludicrous in context, yet similar in sound to what was intended.
It wasn’t celibate but celebrate.

                                                Johann Hamza – The peasant wedding.

An anti-proverb or a perverb is the transformation of a standard proverb for humorous effect. Paremiologist Wolfgang Mieder defines them as “parodied, twisted, or fractured proverbs that reveal humorous or satirical speech play with traditional proverbial wisdom”.

Anti-proverbs have also been defined as “an allusive distortion, parody, misapplication, or unexpected contextualization of a recognized proverb, usually for comic or satiric effect”. To have full effect, an anti-proverb must be based on a known proverb. For example, “If at first you don’t succeed, quit” is only funny if the hearer knows the standard proverb “If at first you don’t succeed, try, try again”.
Born again Satanist.

Cacography is deliberate comic misspelling, a type of humour similar to malapropism.

The term in the sense of “poor spelling, accentuation, and punctuation” is a semantic antonym to orthography, and in the sense of “poor handwriting” it is an etymological antonym to the word calligraphy: cacography is from Greek kakos “bad” and graphe “writing”.
The death leaves after inventarisation,
little room for interpretation.

Doublespeak is language that deliberately obscures, disguises, distorts, or reverses the meaning of words. Doublespeak may take the form of euphemisms (e.g. “downsizing” for layoffs, “servicing the target” for bombing), in which case it is primarily meant to make the truth sound more palatable. It may also refer to intentional ambiguity in language or to actual inversions of meaning. In such cases, doublespeak disguises the nature of the truth. Doublespeak is most closely associated with political language
To create uncertainty in the confusion.

A spoonerism is an error in speech in which corresponding consonants, vowels, or morphemes are switched (see Metathesis) between two words in a phrase. These are named after the Oxford don and ordained minister William Archibald Spooner, who was famous for doing this.

Smart Feller Fart Smeller: And Other Spoonerisms (book)

A bare faced lie – a fair based lie

Beatle song: She was a Daytripper – He was a Gay stripper

A saying is any concisely written or spoken expression that is especially memorable because of its meaning or style.
Tolerance: with closure threatened intermediate station,
on the route ” Irritation – Retaliation.”

                                       The 9:45 Accommodation by Edward Lamson Henr

Slogan: a motto with the goal of persuading.
Save the malaria mosquito.

Paradiastole (from Greek  from para “next to, alongside”, and diastole “separation, distinction”) is the reframing of a vice as a virtue, often with the use of euphemism, for example, “Yes, I know it does not work all the time, but that is what makes it interesting.” It is often used ironically.
It bears witness to the great forbearance of those who despise working, nevertheless turn a blind eye to allow others to do this.

Anti–Paradiastole
Courage is often nothing more than the recklessness of a fool.

Harlequin and Columbine, Pierrot (1914) by F.X. Leyendecke

Political incorrect: It was the situation that Hitler, Stalin, Mao and Pol Pot were political incorrect.
Nowadays you are politically incorrect if you deliver someone hair ache.

In rhetoric, litotes; also known classically as antenantiosis or moderatour) is a figure of speech and form of verbal irony in which understatement is used to emphasize a point by stating a negative to further affirm a positive, often incorporating double negatives for effect.
Litotes is a form of understatement, more specifically meiosis, and is always deliberate with the intention of emphasis. However, the interpretation of negation may depend on context, including cultural context. In speech, it may also depend on intonation and emphasis; for example, the phrase “not bad” can be intonated differently so as to mean either “mediocre” or “excellent”.
Billionaire: It stays difficult.
A billion is no longer what it has been.

A melodrama is a dramatic work in which the plot, which is typically sensational and designed to appeal strongly to the emotions, takes precedence over detailed characterization. Characters are often simply drawn, and may appear stereotyped.
Stubbornness: An impregnable fortress in the land of never.

In narrative, a motif is any recurring element that has symbolic significance in a story. Through its repetition, a motif can help produce other narrative (or literary) aspects such as theme or mood
Motif: A recurring pattern in abstract surface division, musical themes and criminal activities.

A neologism ( from Greek  néo-, “new” and lógos, “speech, utterance”) describes a relatively recent or isolated term, word, or phrase that may be in the process of entering common use, but that has not yet been fully accepted into mainstream language
Elephantastic.

                     Weeks, Edwin Lord The Maharahaj of Gwalior Before His Palace ca 1887 

An ode is a type of lyrical stanza. It is an elaborately structured poem praising or glorifying an event or individual, describing nature intellectually as well as emotionally.
In this unmarked shallow grave,
lies a hero,…. lies the brave.
Memories echo in the distance,
like the howling winds…. persistence.

Onomatopœia (from the Greek for “name” and “I make”, adjectival form: “onomatopœic” or “onomatopœtic”) is the process of creating a word that phonetically imitates, resembles, or suggests the sound that it describes. As such words are uncountable nouns, onomatopoeia refers to the property of such words.
Boeing: Sound of a crashing plane.

Emotive interjections are used to express emotions, such as disgust and fear (e.g. “Yuck!” = disgust).
Weeuuk….:  Oration given by accepting the post of professor in the philosophical argumentation theory

An oxymoron (usual plural oxymorons, more rarely oxymora) is a rhetorical device that uses an ostensible self-contradiction to illustrate a rhetorical point or to reveal a paradox. A more general meaning of “contradiction in terms
Oxide = rusted + moron = idiot
(Rusted idiot).

A parable is a succinct, didactic story, in prose or verse that illustrates one or more instructive lessons or principles. It differs from a fable in that fables employ animals, plants, inanimate objects, or forces of nature as characters, whereas parables have human characters. A parable is a type of analogy.
A postmodernist is someone who is looking for a three-part sliding ladder, because he wants to fasten a condom.

In literature, the paradox is an anomalous juxtaposition of incongruous ideas for the sake of striking exposition or unexpected insight. It functions as a method of literary composition and analysis that involves examining apparently contradictory statements and drawing conclusions either to reconcile them or to explain their presence.
A statement which shows an internal contradiction
Eyeglasses: to see you need a nose and two ears.

If you know everything, then you also know what you don’t know.

Peripeteia is a reversal of circumstances, or turning point. The term is primarily used with reference to works of literature. The Anglicized form of peripeteia is peripety.
I’m no longer the one who I never was.

Personification is an anthropomorphic metaphor in which a thing or abstraction is represented as a person. The type of personification discussed here excludes passing literary effects such as “Shadows hold their breath”, and covers cases where a personification appears as a character in literature, or a human figure in art.
Freud and Jung,
With fruit you stay young.

Obscurantism is the practice of deliberately presenting information in an imprecise and recondite manner, often designed to forestall further inquiry and understanding. There are two historical and intellectual denotations of Obscurantism: (1) the deliberate restriction of knowledge—opposition to disseminating knowledge; and, (2) deliberate obscurity—an abstruse style (as in literature and art) characterized by deliberate vagueness.
The night is a dark affair that cannot stand the light of day.

                                           Shipwreck Warning 1894   de Navarro Llorens

A red herring is something that misleads or distracts from a relevant or important question. It may be either a logical fallacy or a literary device that leads readers or audiences toward a false conclusion. A red herring may be used intentionally, as in mystery fiction or as part of rhetorical strategies (e.g., in politics), or may be used in argumentation inadvertently.
Church steeples refer to eternity,
that’s why clocks are placed on it, because time is money.

Repetition is the simple repeating of a word, within a short space of words (including in a poem), with no particular placement of the words to secure emphasis. It is a multilinguistic written or spoken device, frequently used in English and several other languages, and so rarely termed a figure of speech.
Firstly, yes there is a God.
Secondly,… no it isn’t you.

In social psychology, a stereotype is an over-generalized belief about a particular category of people. Stereotypes are generalized because one assumes that the stereotype is true for each individual person in the category. While such generalizations may be useful when making quick decisions, they may be erroneous when applied to particular individuals. Stereotypes encourage prejudice^[3] and may arise for a number of reasons.
Sitting: A bottom procedure with a broad supporting base.

In literary criticism, stream of consciousness is a narrative mode or method that attempts “to depict the multitudinous thoughts and feelings which pass through the mind” of a narrator. The term was coined by William James in 1890 in his The Principles of Psychology,
The greatest load of crap you can find on this side of eternity.
 
The sublime in literature refers to use of language and description that excites thoughts and emotions beyond ordinary experience. Though often associated with grandeur, the sublime may also refer to the grotesque or other extraordinary experiences that “take[s] us beyond ourselves.”
See: Self-image.

A poet is someone who wants to capture reality in a butterfly net.

In fiction, a subplot is a secondary strand of the plot that is a supporting side story for any story or the main plot. Subplots may connect to main plots, in either time and place or in thematic significance. Subplots often involve supporting characters, those besides the protagonist or antagonist. Subplots may also intertwine with the main plot at some point in a story.
Take life with a pinch of salt, ……
an industrial quantity of alcoholic refreshments
and the company of scantily dressed exotic female dancers.

A syllogism (Greek:  syllogismos, “conclusion, inference”) is a kind of logical argument that applies deductive reasoning to arrive at a conclusion based on two or more propositions that are asserted or assumed to be true.

Some of the earliest syllogisms are defined in the Nyaya school of thought. In a form, defined by Aristotle, from the combination of a general statement (the major premise) and a specific statement (the minor premise), a conclusion is deduced. For example, knowing that all men are mortal (major premise) and that Socrates is a man (minor premise), we may validly conclude that Socrates is mortal. Syllogistic arguments are usually represented in a three-line form:

All men are mortal.
Socrates is a man.
Therefore, Socrates is mortal.
That they poisoned Socrates, makes it empirical.

In literary criticism and rhetoric, a tautology is a statement which repeats an idea, using near-synonymous morphemes, words or phrases, “saying the same thing twice”.
Klojo,  Slomo and Dombo.

The Theatre of the Absurd (French: théâtre de l’absurde) is a post–World War II designation for particular plays of absurdist fiction written by a number of primarily European playwrights in the late 1950s, as well as one for the style of theatre which has evolved from their work. Their work focused largely on the idea of existentialism and expressed what happens when human existence has no meaning or purpose and therefore all communication breaks down. Logical construction and argument give way to irrational and illogical speech and to its ultimate conclusion, silence.
According to the German philosopher Emmanuel Kant, the truth was a “Ding an sich”, which is unknowable.
But how did he know that that was true?

                                      José García Ramos 1905  Leaving a Masqued Ball

Invective is abusive, reproachful, or venomous language used to express blame or censure; or, a form of rude expression or discourse intended to offend or hurt; vituperation, or deeply seated ill will, vitriol. The Latin adjective invectivus means ‘scolding.’
Tirade: An informal consultation, delivering a statement of basic principles

Assonance is a resemblance in the sounds of words/syllables either between their vowels (e.g., meat, bean) or between their consonants (e.g., keep, cape).  However, assonance between consonants is generally called consonance in American usage. The two types are often combined, as between the words six and switch, in which the vowels are identical, and the consonants are similar but not completely identical.
Gothic, neo-gothic, chaotic.

Fairy tales
Malice in Wonderland.

A Freudian slip, also called parapraxis, is an error in speech, memory, or physical action that occurs due to the interference of an unconscious subdued wish or internal train of thought. The concept is part of classical psychoanalysis. Classical examples involve slips of the tongue, but psychoanalytic theory also embraces misreadings, mishearings, temporary forgettings, and the mislaying and losing of objects.
To say erotic when you mean neurotic.

German humour
       14 – 18,  39 – 45
GerMANIC mechanized humor in army green regalia.

Was somewhat laborious.   

Retorts
Another humorous form is the retort. It overlaps with the category of witticism produced in response to a preceding utterance. A retort can be defined as a quick and witty response to a preceding turn with which it forms an adjacency pair A retort is produced with a view to amusing the hearer, albeit not always the direct addressee but the third party
“Your absence was a source of great joy”.

Recovery
Recovery is a combination of blunder and wit, which means that the comedian or the character usually creates humor by making an error, and then saving himself with a fast and witty comeback. This is usually to cancel out on a thought that audiences may derive from what he / she says, often doing so in a way that invokes laughter. This is what also known as a ‘repartee’ where hilarious comebacks and retorts are classic traits of this form of comedy.
Reading:
a: “Did you learn anything from reading all those books?”
b: “Yes, I know everything now.”
a: “Oh, yes?”
b: “Yes, just ask a question.”
a: “Who was the inventor of the lawn mower?”
b: “Well then, the father of the one who invented the lawn mower …..
a: “Yes …….
b: “It was a son of him…..

Staircase Wit 
A staircase wit is the common experience of thinking of the perfect thing to say when its too late to say it. This is a type of counterfactual thinking that can serve as practice for future wit.
“Esprit de l’escalier”: The phenomenon that you come up with the best joke just after you die.

April Fool: Was still funny in March.

Comic: Significantly smaller than Cosmic.

Causative 
Causality: connection between causes and consequences.
If everyone unfolds an umbrella, then it starts raining.

Pull someone’s leg:
To tell someone something that is not true as a way of joking with the person:
A jet leg.

Knock – knock jokes
Knock Out: Beating someone unconscious.
To knock someone out: Therapeutic intervention.
Healing through the laying on of hands.

Pots: German joke from Potsdam

Jester: A total buffoon with a stocking over his head.
It would be better if he robbed a bank.

See: “Jesterday, all his good jokes are so far away,
            now he needs a place to hide away……”

                                                        Jan Matejko: “Stańczyk”  1862

Curved speech:
Burlesque, clownesque and grotesque.

Sardonic: Family member by marriage of Moronic so not genetically affected.

Name calling: Approved for three years and younger.

Hilarity: One of the four pillars of the palace called stupidity.

A double entendre  is a figure of speech or a particular way of wording that is devised to be understood in two ways, having a double meaning. Typically one of the meanings is obvious, given the context, whereas the other may require more thought. The innuendo may convey a message that would be too socially awkward, sexually suggestive, or offensive to state directly (the Oxford English Dictionary describes a double entendre as being used to “convey an indelicate meaning”, whilst Longman Dictionary of Contemporary English defines it as “a word or phrase that may be understood in two different ways, one of which is often sexual”).
Sex: Entering midships.

^{An Attack on a Galleon – Howard Pyle}

Quip: A quip is a funny or clever comment that is a response to a current situation.
Joke with a short braking distance.

Object    – Process
Crèche   – Crash
Utility     – Futility
Jumper  – Jumper
Cheque  – Chique
Dandy    – Trendy

Legal maxim
People that think black and white shouldn’t be allowed to postulate value judgments on off-colour jokes.

Absurdity
I didn’t called that person a total moron, basically I wouldn’t do that, not because that’s insulting,
but if he was a total moron, that would be a significant improvement to the current situation.

Double negative: we never used, not once, on no occasion, not at all, under no circumstances, by no means, in no way, on no account, a double negative.

But then again the photographer was with his negatives.

Boutade: (from the French bouter, “expel”) is a concise, sharp and witty statement that expresses a certain discontentment.
I didn’t tell that joke with the intention to hurt your feelings.
You are not that important.

Shift
Scan, scam, sham.

Emphasis
JeaLOUSY         

Word-definition
Adolescence: Magical realistic transition phase from silliness to uselessness. 

Anxiety: Memory for future events

Antipathy: A slight preference for something else.

Apathy: Land of origin.

Arrogance: Makes it clear that there are more serious forms
       of poverty than lack of money.

                                       Bacci Ball – Ludovico Marchetti (Italian, 1853-1909)

Bigamy: double parked.

Blood: Circulation fluid, which is shed for noble purposes. 

Blundering: The standard procedure.

Boat: May not be too long or it will be a bridge.

Brutality: Artificial intelligence.

Carelessness: French dessert sauce.

Conclusion: Special kind of mistake.

Character: An outstanding arsenal of shortcomings.

Conscience: Mental function with an extremely limited
        employability.
        Deprived neighborhood in the metropolis called morality.
        The government in exile.

Conservatism: Mental constipation. The human mind frozen
        in time.

Corrupt: Fully acclimatized.

Critic: A bitter heart has a false tongue.

Day of peace: 31. February.

Decency: This article is temporarily unavailable.

Dictatorship:  One-man show

Disrespectful: the rudeness with which you treat me, in an
       age of hypocrisy, is truly refreshing.

Ego: Landing platform for toadies, flatterers, bootlickers and
        sycophants.

Egoism: System administrator. 

Empty: The horn of abundance.

Evaluation: The ancient Greeks believed that the sphere was
        the most perfect form.
        Your treatise on the nature of reality reminds me of a  
         sphere. However, not because of its supposed perfection,
         but because of its one-sidedness.

Everything: An absolutely insufficient amount. 

Expert: Tragically hindered by knowledge of the facts,
             a disastrously acquaintance with relevant particulars in
             an informed manner.
             Very unfortunately and regrettably having skills in terms
             of competencies, experience and knowledge.

Extinguished: The eternal flame.

Failure: An event that meets the scientific requirement of empirical repeatability. 

Fantasy: Virtual reality. 

Flattery: Approach route to the landing place called abuse.

Flown:   The reflections of a poet,
               The chimeras of a dreamer,
               The monetary means of a fool,
               The joy of a bitter heart.

Future: The contours of an impending doom.

Generalissimo: Three star chef who wants to heat up the cold war.

                              Eugenio Álvarez Dumont (Túnez, 1864 – Buenos Aires 1927)

Gimmick: a trick intended to attract attention,
       such as collect money with a revolver. 

Good taste: Not a determining factor.

Group therapy: The appropriate treatment method for persons with a multiple personality disorder. 

Guillotine: Was used for a formal reprimandation that did leave little room for interpretation.

Happiness: Extremely volatile substance, last seen in the presence of a
                     large sum of money.

Historian: The chronicler of madness.
                  The curator of the absurdity.

Hobby: Event of a great cosmic significance, not to be confused with work

Hope: The flagship on the sea of ​​desires, appears to be sinking.

William Lionel Wyllie (London 1851-1931)

Ideal: In the typology of the mental subject matter,
the trick article.

Identical: Equally deplorable.

Inner life: The petrified forest. 

Intelligence: The cavalry that usually enters the battlefield  too late….

                                                       by Lady Elizabeth Butler

Jogging: And other horror stories.

Joker: Should take his medication on time. 

                                       Zamacois y Zabala : The favourite of the king  1865

Journalistic integrity: Joke of two words.

Jubilation mood: A very particular approach to reality. 

Jugendstil: Art made with a curling iron.

Kinky: The list of operational details has not yet been
        officially ratified. 

Kiri; Japanese family name, first name Harry.

K.O.  not  O.K.

Korsakov syndrome: I have forgotten what that means.

Lazy: The gift of solving problems by ignoring them. 

Laziness: Reprehensible behavior from people of low allooi. Not to be confused with the thoughtfulness of the notable or wealthy.

Laziness: Taking a lenient attitude with regard to the
        circumstances

      Jose Villegas Cordero  (26 August 1844, Seville – 9 November 1921, Madrid)   Siesta

Lens: Deceptive attribute that makes objects appear larger
            and closer than they actually are.
            Can serve as a metaphor for the human pursuit of
            wish fulfillment.

Life: Name of the discrepancy between intentions and
         realization.

 Like-minded: People of exquisite refinement, who possess an
         admirable sharpness of perception.
       “The noble defenders of the Faith.”  

Melancholic: Yesterday it was already five to ten, but that didn’t last long.

Memories: Acheron, the river that flows into the Greek
         underworld, the shadow realm. 

Middle: A certain place to the right of the left, left of the right,
        above the bottom and below the top, behind the front and
        in front of the back.

        Explanation concerning  reversed, inside-out, backwards
         and upside-down will follow. 

Monday morning: The bridge of sorrows.
         The valley of the shadow of death.
        

 
Narcissist: Someone who is consistent in his distastefulness.

Nervous breakdown: Galvanic erosion of my steel nerves. 

Never: Fairly long period.

Normality: An eminent company consisting of conformism,
         narrow-mindedness and stupidity.

Nose: Located at the front, or in other people’s affairs.

Obstinate: A metal alloy of stubbornness and short-sightedness. 

Opinion: Garrison city where the army of the fools is located

Optimism: A very disturbing mood disorder. 

Optimism: ist nicht Existenz berechtigd

Optimist:  A patient who suffers from a persistent morbid cheerfulness.  

People with different opinions: Persons with paved opinions and asphalted prejudices.

Personality: A very deplorable assortment of deficiencies.

Personality disorders: Collect all 160. 

Philanthropy: An disease that will never become an epidemic.

Picturesque: From an exceptional sublime aesthetic view.
         Towns that were built before municipal authorities and
         beauty committees were involved.

                                            Joseph Theodor Hansen  (1848 – 1912)

Poverty: Forms together with honesty a dysfunctional family. 

Pyromania: Contagious enthusiasm. 

Quantum mechanics: The branch of physics that proved that Schrodinger was not a cat person.

Quarrel: Consultation afterwards.

Quarrel: A difference in appreciation of the situation.

Quarrel: An evaluation exchange.

Quarrel: A disagreement that has matured.

Racism: Fruit of the tree called stupidity

Radio: Electronic medium that is highly superior to
         television, in particular with regard to:
         Mime, striptease, sign language, painting exhibitions, etc. 

Reasonable: Of a fundamentally different nature.

Rightful: The “Human Rights” commission has recently
         included a clause that gives people the right to laugh at
         their own stupidities.         So, lucky you. 

Schoolboy: Someone who combines a minimum motivation to a maximum disinterest. 

Sincerity: Special kind of shamelessness. 

Siren: A mechanism activated by law enforcement officers that ensures that lawbreakers can get away in time. 

Spaghetti: 120 linear meters of reprehensible distastefulness.

Stubbornness: central door-lock.

Stupidity: Not necessarily feigned.

Talk show: Route that follows the forced cheerfulness of worn out platitudes via ramshackle pseudo-humor to indigestible insignificance.

Telephone: Clever mechanism that ensures that people now can also be disrespectful from a great distance. 

Tolerance: polite hostility. 

Total abstainer: Now, a very regrettable misunderstanding has crept into the reporting. 

Tradition: An ancient and extremely malicious form of sorcery.

Trivialities: The main component of the conversation.

Underdog: Teckel and hide.

Ups and downs: The events in chronological order. 

Urgency: Not a bureaucratic procedure. 

Urgency statement: Artillery fire. 

Utopian: Dramatic battle between the absurd and the bizarre. 

 Valuta: Goddess of greed. 

Vandalism: philosophical movement that places acting
      actively above consensus.

Visit: I shall inform the lackeys, the paladins, the
      major-domus, the court dignitaries and the keeper of the
      grand seal of your arrival. 

                                                                 Jan Matejko  1891

Vocabulary: Ammunition Depot.  

War: German export article.

Wealth: Grandeur, clouds of glory, the hallmark of great
          merit, summit of dignity, favored by the gods.          
                        “The splendor of existence.”

Work: A tormenting done to us by a gang of malicious sociopaths. 

Working: A severe violation of your artistic integrity. 

                         Arredondo y Calmache, Ricardo (1850 – 1911) – Tanners Workshop

Working: The ship of darkness on an ocean of light. 

Xeno: The flying power of an elephant. 

Xeno: A fish with an outboard motor. 

Xeren:   Annie. 

XQ’s  me.

Yesterday: The right time to do what you have bequeathed.

Your  danië,  not mine.

Youth: Butterflies that become caterpillars.

Youth of today: Is blatantly immoral,  ….
        for more than 5,000 years.

Yell: Matzer und Patzer. 

Yell: A sorry story. 

Zeal: The eagerness of Youth. 

Zealotry: Fanaticism, self-development for the advanced. 

Zero: Your adversary, who in this capacity makes a
        fundamental contribution to the Number theory.

Zero point energy: Monday morning.